I really wish our minds had little typewriters that would somehow have wifi or print out the thoughts we have, because I could easily have most of my posts done in the shower. That’s just a little taste of my randomness you’ll learn to love along the way.
At 27 years of age, and honestly every year prior to this for the past 9 years, I’ve struggled with the so-called “big” question of “what am I suppose to do with my life.” The question itself has put me into dark places repeatedly over that time frame to where I didn’t even want to exist anymore and begged God to just put me out of my misery. I know, I know, that may seem dramatic to some of you, but depression and anxiety (both of which run in my family) thrive on getting the best of someone’s soul. We basically become a victim and have to go to battle. I’d throw in a Game of Thrones pun but I’m 1 of 5 Americans that hasn’t been exposed to the show…yet! Thankfully, I haven’t seen the black cloud since February 2015. But don’t think I survived that easily, the “big” question still peeks its scrawny head around to say hey what’s up, cause sometimes I feel like I still don’t have the answer and I have one thing to say to that, it’s A OK.
Although I feel pretty content in life at this moment minus a few details; I think we get so caught up on standards that are shown all over social media, billboards, and television that we feel we must meet…what do they call that, oh yeah the “social norms.” *Insert eye roll emoji* It’s the pressures of by this age you should be married (that’s a post or two in itself), or when will you have kids, or your job title isn’t followed by CEO or M.D. that tend to make it easy for us to get wrapped up in what we should do or be; instead of what our hearts truly long for and the happiness we’d like to achieve. Now don’t get me wrong, if your dream is to be a head honcho and you won’t stop until you’re making six figures or more then by all means chase what you hunger. I’m just stating that it really shouldn’t matter what anyone thinks about your life because it is YOUR life. I want you to pursue what makes you smile, what makes you proud, what makes your time on Earth worth it. And that also goes along the lines of be with who makes you feel like you won the lottery or who sees life the way you do so you can conquer any and all of it together. You (and I) do not have to justify the way we feel when we do or don’t want to do something. Now I’m not saying quit your day job to chase what you desire (unless you have savings or a great support system), but to make time for a passion or hobby you enjoy. This way it will be fulfilling in the sense of accomplishing what you like to do, not the strain of “should” be doing. Of course if you are one of the 10 people who are born with the “I know what I want to be when I grow up” and actually become it, then that’s great too and I’m glad for you! I admire people with vision and ambition. I have found that making time for my love of photography, adventures, and now utilizing my brain to write for my blog has made me very happy, focused, and less stressed about life as a whole. I’ll touch base on my slow transition to living minimally which will revisit the purpose of this entry and give you more insight of living a deliberate life.
Ultimately, we all have a purpose or else we wouldn’t exist. Yes, it can be difficult to pinpoint where that purpose lies, but it will be revealed. In the meantime, try to find a balance between making enough to live a stable life but also a life fully lived.